FUKITOL

If only you could really buy that. Things have been hell at work. Yesterday, my boss gives me shit cause he thinks I was late. Uhhh, I was actually a few mins. early yesterday. Him and his wife fought yesterday, as usual. I really do wish they could go somewhere else and do that. Then I had to ask if I could leave early today so I can go do somethings. Well, that didn't sit to well with him. "It's the first of the month." " I need you in the office." It's ridiculous. I hardly ever ask for anything, especially time off. In 3 yrs., I've left early 2 times and missed one day of work. Then this morning, I was vacumming, and he called. I missed it. Well, he thinks that just cause I didn't answer the damn thing that I wasn't there. Whatever. Says I was 30 mins. late. Again, I was early if anything. I bust my ass doing whatever he ask me and I feel unappreciated. Like what I do doesn't even matter. Almost like I'm not entitled to get alittle time off. Hell, I don't even take my vacation days. i just get the paycheck. This year, I'm taking my weeks vacation and laying around not doing a damn thing!

I'm worried about money. I fucked up along time ago and charged alot of stuff on credit cards. They are getting paid off, but, I can't stop worrying till it's completely paid off. Money itself just worries me. I'm a worrier.

My head hurts. I'm tired. I feel so exhausted. I slept a good part of the day yesterday. And if I wasn't sleeping, I was crying. Mom said something about me sounding depressed. Ya think? I am actually proud of her, though. She defended me against my boss. (she works with me to..oh, what a joy! sarcasm) But I swear, it's ok for her to yell at me and stuff, but no one else is allowed too. I dunno.